Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Right and Wrong & Right and Left


Even though I am not the most religious person, I do enjoy spirituality.  I love hearing different theories that try to explain why the world is the way it is, and why people act the way they do.  One of my favorite things to read are horoscopes and astrological traits.  Based on date of birth, each person is assigned an astrological sign.  People that have the same astrological sign share common traits.  For example, I am a Libra.  According to astrology, Libras hate conflict, and do anything they can to have a cooperative balance between themselves and the people around them.  Libras are so concerned with peace and harmony that it's sign is a balance.  Libras have a pretty good sense of what is right and wrong, and are at their best when collaborating with the people around them.  Libra's love to learn and gain new perspectives through interaction with others.


Oscar Wilde once said, "Morality, like art, means drawing a line somewhere." A moral person is able to distinguish between good and bad behavior, and learn this difference through interactions at home, school, work, and other social environments.  Lawrence Kohlberg proposed that morality is constantly being shaped and molded throughout a person's lifetime, and created six stages of moral development.  The preconventional stages revolve around the self.  The first stage is obedience to authority.  A person is less likely to perform an immoral action if they have a chance of being caught.  The second stage is instrumental.  This means that a person is more likely to perform an action if they will experience personal gain.  Next, the conventional stages are based on external factors.  The third stage is interpersonal norms.  A person is more likely to perform if they feel that they are expected to. The fourth stage is societal norms.  People act in specific ways based on social cues and expectations. The postconventional stages have a more altruistic view of what is right and wrong.  The fifth stage is the social contract.  People are willing to overlook and break social rules if they are deemed invalid.  The final stage is universal ethical principles.  People in this stage regard themselves on the basis of equality and have no problem going against norms for the sake of justice.  Based on these stages, there are a few questions that can be raised.  First, does moral reasoning actually lead to moral behavior?  It is one thing to know what the right thing is, but it is another to perform moral actions.  Second, Kohlberg stresses the ideas of justice in his theories, but does not fully account for the fact that emotions can sometimes inhibit our ability to reason morally.  Third, Kohlberg's theory is based on personal rights rather than society and community as a whole.  While this theory supports individualist cultures, collectivist groups may have different methods of moral reasoning that Kohlberg is missing.  

Another perspective of moral reasoning comes from Jonathan Haidt, who raises some pretty controversial dilemmas in order to get his point across.  One of his most known dilemmas is the story of Julie and Mark, siblings who engage in protected but incestual relations to try something new, and asks readers to determine if this is a moral action.  Many people say that it is not, but Haidt always has a rebuttal for every argument made. "That is disgusting!" - obviously not for them.  "Genetic mutations are bound to happen!" - most likely not since two forms of contraceptives were used.  The list goes on.  What Haidt is trying to show here is that people have an initial reaction to a stimulus before reasoning with it.  We as humans like to believe that we have complete control over our emotions because of our free will.  However, research has shown that we have no control over our initial reaction to a stimulus, but after that reaction we are then able to process the information.  

One of Haidt's theories is called the Social Institutionalist Model, which states that moral judgment is mostly based on automatic processes rather than on conscious reasoning. People engage in reasoning largely to find evidence to support their initial responses.  This theory was then extended to become the Moral Foundations Theory.  This theory suggests there are at least six innate moral foundations, upon which cultures develop their various moralities.  The six are care/harm, fairness/cheating, liberty/oppression, loyalty/betrayal, authority/subversion, and sanctity/degradation. The theory was developed to explain cross-cultural differences in morality, but has also been found to explain differences in political views.  For example, democrats, liberals, and those who are more toward the left on the political spectrum tend to focus more on the aspects of care, fairness, and liberty, while republicans, conservatives, and right-winged thinkers tend to utilize all six foundations equally.

When I think of a moral character, I always think of the film "To Kill A Mockingbird."  The film (originally a novel written by Harper Lee) is based in Georgia in the 1930's, where racism and oppression were extremely prevalent.  Atticus Finch is a lawyer who takes on the job of representing Tom Robinson, an African American man who is charged with rape and assault of a young white female.  Although the entire city was totally against Tom due to the color of his skin (even though he was innocent), Atticus still fought for this mans rights.  Atticus saw Tom as a human being with rights, while the rest of the town saw Tom as an unequal.  At one point in the film, Atticus states (in regards to Tom), "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view, until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it," and that basically sums up his moral character.  Based on Kohlberg's stages, Atticus Finch can definitely be placed in the postconventional level because he looks at representing Tom as a universal ethical principle, and is able to realize that justice and equality should be part of our moral compass, regardless of existing laws and social rules.

Monday, October 6, 2014

Untying The Knot

Merriam-Webster defines marriage as "the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law."  Marriage is one of the most sacred events in many religions and is transforming as time continues.  In the past, the matrimonial ceremony would always take place in a holy building, such as a church or temple.  Recently, marriage has become less and less religious, and more of a social event.  People are beginning to get married on beaches, cruises, and even amusement parks to liven up the event.  But marriages are not all fun and games - any type of relationship requires an equal amount of work from both parties for the best results and overall satisfaction.

At Catholic weddings, new spouses vow to the other that they are "to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, until death do us part." Sadly, many couples are not able to keep their promises and end up splitting up.  Divorce is starting to become a normal occurrence in this day and age, as approximately 50% of marriages end up in divorce.  According to The Huffington Post, the top ten reasons for divorce include:
  1. Infidelity
  2. Unhappiness
  3. Too much arguing
  4. Fell out of love
  5. Little to no communication
  6. Wanted different things
  7. Their partner changed
  8. Felt no connection to their partner
  9. Abuse
  10. Financial issues

People contemplating divorce take approximately two years to decide what they want, and spend 18 months out of 24 trying to fix and work things out in their relationship, whether it is for themselves or for their children.  A significant amount of people view divorce as a personal failure, causing them to be hesitant to make the heartbreaking choice of leaving their partner.  Divorce can happen to couples of all ages.  Surprisingly, it is becoming more and more common to find couples over 50 years old file for divorce.  As human life expectancy grows, people at the age of 50 are expected to live for another 25+ healthy years, and with the children grown up and moved out, people are likely to opt out of bad or even stale relationships.  In this day and age, there are many different options for people who are not excited by their marriages.  More often than not, divorces are initiated by women, as women are much less tolerant of an ordinary and unfulfilling relationship.  Maybe this is because relationships (and the idea of love) has been so romanticized, and more and more pressure is put on men to go above and beyond to show their affection for their partner. Women are beginning to expect men to give more because women are more in touch with their needs and are able to support themselves, and begin to put their own needs on the back burner for the sake of their marriage. Another explanation is that when a couple divorces, the women are usually favored, and are given custody of the children.  Men are afraid of losing their children, and will choose to continue in the relationship, even if they are unhappy.

Many people question whether marriage is a civil right or not.  According to the United States Constitution (specifically Section 1 of the Fourteenth Amendment), "No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws."  This passage was applied to marriage in Supreme Court case Loving v. Virginia in 1967, where the Chief Justice stated, "The freedom to marry has long been recognized as one of the vital personal rights essential to the orderly pursuit of happiness by free men ... To deny this fundamental freedom...is surely to deprive all the State's citizens of liberty without due process of law. The Fourteenth Amendment requires that the freedom of choice to marry not be restricted...Under our Constitution, the freedom to marry, or not marry, a person...resides with the individual and cannot be infringed by the State."  This case was specifically speaking about interracial marriage, but in the current age, same-sex marriage is the new hot topic.  

Same-sex marriage is a very popular debate all over the nation.  While some states have legalized it, other states are extremely opposed to the idea.  Some feel that the sanctity of marriage will be ruined, while other oppose the union of same-sex couples based on religious beliefs.  However, as stated by the 1967 case, the freedom to marry or not should be up to the people involved, and not the governing bodies.  In my opinion, if two people love each other, then gender should not play a role in their ability to unite under the eyes of the law.
The Williams Institute, part of the University of California Los Angeles, conducted research to compare marriage and divorce statistics between straight and same-sex couples.  The research provided astounding results.  First, marriage is much more appealing for same-sex couples because it is not as easy to attain.  Furthermore, same-sex couples strive to earn the acceptance and symbolism that comes with marriage, while straight couples are only required to say "I do" (without any hate attached) to achieve the same things.  Another finding is that divorce rate is lower for same-sex couples.  The researchers believe that this is because partners in same-sex relationships are more likely to date for a longer period of time before agreeing to wed, giving them more time to experience arguments and commit to becoming a family.  
How I Met Your Mother star Neil Patrick Harris and his family.

These statistics get me to thinking about children with gay/lesbian parents.  Some children have straight parents that do not properly care for them and love them, but they are able to have as many children as they please because of their anatomy.  On the other hand, same-sex couples struggle to adopt children because they are the same gender, even though they will love and care for that child unconditionally because they are unable to conceive naturally.  This irritates me.  Personally, I don't think that the gender of the parents should be a barrier - as long as the child is properly cared for and loved, then the sex of the parents should not matter.